Staff Sergeant Drew Koch, Iraq Correspondent

Staff Sergeant Drew Koch shares his views about current happenings in the Middle East. Everything said in this article is of his own opinion and not to be confused with the official standing of the U.S. Army. This week’s question: What is the hardest thing about being away from home for so long?

The hardest thing about being away for so long is definitely not being there for my family.  It sucks for me too, but I chose this profession, I chose this way of life.  My children didn’t.  

Think of all the things that your father has been there for.  I have missed three years of my kids’ lives.  My Tristan is seven years old.  I was in Afghanistan when he was born. I came home when he was three months old, left for Iraq when he was eight months old, and came home when he was 17 months old.  Ordered to recruiting duty where there were weeks when I wouldn’t see him (except asleep) until Friday.  I worked six days a week and averaged 11 hours a day for the 33 months that I was a recruiter.  So at this point, Tristan would be 60 months old.  That is five years.  Fun isn’t over yet, I went from recruiting duty back to the 82nd Airborne Division again.  Upon arriving there, went back to Iraq for nine more months.  Finally had 12 months at home.  Following that, 12 months back here to Iraq this time, for a 12 month deployment.  

So one of the hard things about being away, is the volume of time that I have to spend away from my family.  I wish it wasn’t so, but it is what is required of us to keep our homes safe.  I understand the requirements of my occupation. I don’t necessarily like the requirements all the time, but I understand them.  The hardest part though is worrying that my choice of occupation and the time requirements of my occupation will have a negative effect on my family.  

On my children, I have a seven year old son and truly have not been nearly as big a part of his life as I would like to be.  I have been deployed or a recruiter (putting in depressing amounts of hours) for the vast majority of his life.  I only use this to illustrate that in his seven years, I have been mostly absent.  I also have three other children who are all teenagers now and I have been absent in their lives for that time too.  I worry that it has taken a toll on my relationship with my kids and my wife.  These thoughts are what make being away so hard.